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Priceless self defense skills we all need

by Lori Hoeck on January 9, 2010


When a serial killer or a child kidnapping hits the local news, enrollment in self defense and karate classes jump. It seems self defense is all too often an after-the-fact reaction (but hey, better late than never).

Still, self defense is better served when taught as a life skill like cooking or handling finances.

So why do people ignore something so valuable until after the fact or when an incident scares them?

I think part of the reason is self defense, via classes or the martial arts, has a poor track record in public relations. Many folks see self defense or karate as “chopsockey” or too scary or too time consuming.

Yet, when self defense is learned as a life skill, the resulting boundary setting abilities, the awareness, and the body language knowledge can develop a powerful and healthy sense of:

  • “I am worth defending.”
  • “My emotions are worth protecting.”
  • “My well-being is worth leaving the influence of users, abusers, and narcissists.”

Pro-active self defense (discussed in detail in my ebook on self defense) and active self defense work hand in hand to help kids and us avoid:

  • The hell of being bullied
  • The hell of being stalked
  • The hell of being groomed by a predator
  • The hell of marrying someone abusive and controlling
  • The hell of deteriorating health from an abusive boss
  • The hell of not knowing what to do with an active shooter blasting through your workplace
  • The hell of letting a church authority figure rule and ruined your marriage
  • The hell of every sales person strong-arming you into a purchase
  • The hell of going numb watching a terrorist starting to light a bomb in his underwear
  • The hell of knowing your college kid had a professor get away with putting his hand down her shirt

Sounds like self defense skills are well worth tons of money and time, doesn’t it, perhaps even priceless?

Why do you think people may not see it this way?

Thank you for visiting and learning about self defense.
If you think others can benefit, please pass it on!

Lori Hoeck

Photo: Jeremy Barwick


1 Betsy Wuebker January 9, 2010 at 8:17 pm

Hi Lori – I think there are a variety of reasons, most of them rooted in the “it could never happen to me” mindset. I think back and realize how poorly that attitude served me in some lousy and several dangerous situations. People don’t want to deal with what scares them, either. They’d rather avoid, or not confront. Unfortunately, playing it safe doesn’t necessarily keep you safe. Thanks.

2 Lori Hoeck January 9, 2010 at 9:53 pm

Hi Betsy,
For me, personally, playing it safe only lasts so long and eats the at the heart and mind because it’s a reaction to fear, not a courageous response.

3 Davina January 15, 2010 at 12:40 am

Hi Lori. I think it’s mostly because people become complacent. As Betsy says, they believe it could never happen to them. It’s hard to imagine “practicing” this too, and that is the only way to be proactive isn’t it? Practice and be aware.

4 Lori Hoeck January 15, 2010 at 10:31 am

Hi Davina,
I hope to find a way to make the resistance to “practice” less as I teach this as a mindset. Tough going, though!

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